The Qld private schools named on rape culture website revealed


March 05, 20215:01 pm

Stephanie Bennett | The Courier-Mail


Queensland’s most prestigious boys’ schools have been rocked by graphic allegations of rape and sexual assault committed by current and former students, with private school girls publishing shocking claims online.

Allegations against Brisbane Grammar School, Brisbane Boys’ College, Toowoomba Grammar School, Nudgee College, St Joseph’s College Gregory Terrace, Anglican Church Grammar School and St Laurence’s College students are among the thousands of testimonies posted on a viral petition calling for earlier education on sexual consent.

Petition creator Sydney student Chanel Contos’ call for victims to share stories of sexual assaults perpetrated by all-boys’ school students in an effort to highlight “rape culture” has resulted in more than 4000 responses from across the county.

 Chanel Contos launched a petition and website which was flooded with allegations of rape and sexual assault by private school students. Picture: Instagram

Ms Contos said distressing stories from Queensland girls quickly flooded in after the petition was shared widely on social media.

One posted by a former All Hallows’ student alleges she was raped by a boy from the prestigious St Laurence’s School in Brisbane, while a second All Hallows’ student claims she was coerced into losing her virginity to a Churchie boy and woke up “covered in blood”.

 A number of former All Hallows’ students claim they were raped by boys from Brisbane private schools. Picture: Supplied

Another wrote there were “multiple occasions with various students from St Laurence’s and St Joseph’s College Gregory Terrace – I learnt the hard way about consent.

“I was raped and left in the dark, bleeding between my legs as I was robbed of my virginity. “It was painful and I didn’t tell anyone because I was ashamed.”

A claim by a former Stuartholme student alleges she was raped at a party by a Terrace student.

“Everyone at that party including my ‘friends’ at the time let me get drunkenly led into that room and no one did anything to intervene,” the post states.

Another Stuartholme student wrote she was coerced into having sex by an older boy and “eventually gave in”.

A post claiming to be from a former St Aidan’s Anglican Girls School student alleges she was raped in Year 9 by a Year 10 Nudgee College student.

“Immediately after the assault I told a friend and she slut shamed me and told me I was ‘too drunk’ and asked ‘what did you expect’,” it read.

St Joseph’s Gregory Terrace College at Spring Hill. Picture: Supplied
St Laurence’s College in South Brisbane. Picture: Supplied

A fellow St Aidan’s student wrote she was “digitally raped” at a school dance by a Brisbane Boys’ College student while his friends laughed.

Ms Contos said while the majority of responses to her petition referenced private boys’ schools, she believed similar stories were happening “in every school in Australia”.

“But the issue is heightened in same sex schools because it’s not an adequate representation of reality,” she said.

“You often only see the opposite sex on the weekend, when the main goal is having a story to tell on Monday.”

Ms Contos said while she had been in touch with politicians from New South Wales and Victoria in regards to the disturbing nature of the allegations, no one from the Queensland government had yet attempted to contact her.

Headmasters and principals expressed their horror at the allegations, and said they were committed to enhancing programs focused on educating their students on consent and respectful sexual relationships.

Brisbane Grammar School headmaster Anthony Micallef
Churchie headmaster Dr Alan Campbell

Brisbane Grammar School headmaster Anthony Micallef yesterday wrote to parents he was “appalled” by the accounts.

“While every school has programs to educate students about respectful relationships, drugs and alcohol, and the issue of consent, every parent and educator fears that young people may still make terrible decisions that have lifelong consequences,” Mr Micallef said.

“The traumatic experiences the young women describe in the online petition, and the behaviours perpetrated by young men, suggest this issue is ongoing and must be addressed.”

Churchie headmaster Alan Campbell also issued a letter to parents, stating as a boys school they had a “special responsibility” to educate boys to grow to be good men who will respect women and men equally.

He said sexual consent was taught and discussed in Year 9 and Year 12.

Brisbane Boys’ College at Toowong. Picture: Facebook

Toowoomba Grammar Headmaster John Kinniburgh commended the girls for “standing up and speaking out.”

“No person, regardless of age or gender, should ever be subjected to unwanted sexual or peer group pressure,” he said.

“TGS has programs in place that teach students about respectful relationships, consent and the criminal nature of sexual harassment and assault.”

St Joseph’s College, Gregory Terrace principal Michael Carroll said the school’s sex education began in Year 5 and 6, with consent addressed directly with Years 10, 11 and 12.

“We have been developing a stronger focus on respectful relations over the past 12-18 months at Terrace and this has been a significant stimulus to create a narrower focus around age-appropriate discussions about sex education and in particular, consent in sex,” he said.


RETRIEVED https://apple.news/AYYXrnri3R7ufgWE3Me6ORQ

Labor says Coalition has botched child abuse redress scheme after $610m budget shortfall revealed

The government claims payments so far point to ‘a more even spread of applications’ over the scheme’s 10-year life

Shadow social services minister Linda Burney
Linda Burney says 60,000 child sexual abuse survivors are estimated to be eligible for the national redress scheme, but just 2,250 had been paid by June. Photograph: Joel Carrett/AAPElias Visontay@EliasVisontaySun 26 Jul 2020 06.00 AEST

Labor is accusing the Morrison government of framing issues with the national child abuse redress scheme as budget “savings”, after the government revealed it expects to spend $610m less on payments to victims over the next two years.

The financial figures indicating the National Redress Scheme for survivors of institutional child sexual abuse has not delivered as previously expected come as the scheme falls about 12,500 applications short of the amount the royal commission believed would have been lodged by now.

In its budget update released last week, under the “major decreases in payments” section, the government explains the $610m decrease in payments to the fiscal year 2020-21 “largely reflects a re-profiling of expenditure due to slower than expected uptake by survivors accessing redress”.

The government said there had also been “an associated downward re-profiling of the expected receipts received from the institutions liable for the payments”, noting that once redress offers are accepted by victims, payments are generally made to them within a week.

While the government defends this as an indication survivor applications will be more spread out over the scheme’s 10-year window, Labor believes it demonstrates decision-making delays and poor processes plaguing the scheme, which echoes advocates’ concerns earlier this month that child sexual abuse survivors are still being re-traumatised because of shortcomings in scheme.

The opposition’s social services spokeswoman, Linda Burney, said the reduction in spending on redress payments was because “the government has botched the implementation” of the scheme.Government threatens to name ‘reprehensible’ institutions that don’t join child sex abuse redress schemeRead more

Burney said that while the royal commission into institutional child sexual abuse had estimated 60,000 survivors would be eligible for the scheme, just 2,250 applications had been processed and victims paid out by the end of May.Advertisementhttps://tpc.googlesyndication.com/safeframe/1-0-37/html/container.html

“At this rate it will take around 50 years for the total estimated number of survivors to receive redress,” Burney said.

“This is the latest insult for survivors who have already waited too long for redress.”

She said that in the more than two years the scheme had been operating, “survivors have been reporting poor processes, unfair and inconsistent decision making, inadequate payments and chronic delays”.

“The National Redress Scheme is meant to deliver justice for survivors, not savings for governments and institutions.

“The scheme simply isn’t working as planned – thousands of people who deserve justice simply aren’t coming forward and the government needs to fix it,” she said.

However, the minister for social services, Anne Ruston, said “this is not a budget saving”, and the $610m reduction in spending on payments was instead an indication there would now be “a more even spread of applications lodged” over the 10-year life of the scheme.

“When the scheme was first set up we believed, based on the advice of the royal commission, that in 2019-20 and 2020-21 we would have received about 20,000 applications. However, we instead received about 7,500 applications.

“Our original forecasts estimated that there would be a large number of applications received in the first few years … This is why the budget papers refer to reprofiling.

“Importantly, this is not a budget saving. The way the scheme works is that the commonwealth pays out redress payments once a survivor has accepted their offer and then the commonwealth recoups the payment from the relevant institutions later.”

Ruston said the government had “not shied away from the fact that the scheme is not perfect”, but said there were “various reasons applications may have come in more slowly than first assumed”.

“This may include that fact that it has taken some time to get all relevant institutions on board as well as the changes that have been made to the statute of limitations related to child sexual abuse in most states and territories since the scheme commenced,” she said.

The Guardian understands that at the end of June, 2,726 victims had received payments, while 350 cases had been processed in the first year of the scheme.

The average payment under the scheme has so far been $82,000.

The change in expected spending on the scheme comes after the federal government banned federal funding and threatened the charitable status of six groups that refused to notify of their intention to join the two-year window that ended on 30 June 2020. Since then, the number of institutions has reduced to four.


RETRIEVED https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2020/jul/26/labor-says-coalition-has-botched-child-abuse-redress-scheme-after-610m-budget-shortfall-revealed

Memories Can’t Be Buried


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Memories Can’t Be Buried

August 31, 2020 Posted by Tim LennonSurvivor SupportNo Comments


Horrific memories, nightmares, and other forms of PTSD burden survivors of sexual abuse. Memories of violent sexual abuse become too painful to endure. The natural response of those overwhelmed by horrific memories is to bury the memories, cover them up, ignore them, push them away. Many try to flood the memories in drugs and alcohol to dampen the pain and anguish. These approaches attempt to keep out the harmful memories, but they can’t be buried.  

While we may not consciously remember the sexual abuse, the emotional memories are present—always. This gives rise to other emotional effects such as depression, low self-esteem, fear, anxiety, etc. Sometimes we are not aware of the impact of the unconscious memories. Sometimes we cannot get the emotional baggage out of our conscious, day to day, activities. Sometimes these memories can attack us in terrifying nightmares.

CHILDUSA points out that memories of violent sexual remain buried until the average age of 52! This delayed emergence of memory is especially true of those sexually attacked as children. My view is that memories of our abuse surface when we have the strength of character to face them. In my case, the most violent and horrific memories did not surface until I was 63. 

I believe that the best path forward is to acknowledge the memory, incorporate them as part of who we are as a full person. It is an incredibly difficult process but a process that will eliminate the imprisonment of memories that controls our lives. It can be liberating.

Several elements ensure the success of the integration of harmful memories. It is a challenging journey, and gathering support is necessary. The first is to embrace those closest to you and seek their support, such as family or close friends. The second is to engage with a therapist who specializes in sexual trauma. The third is to participate in a support group through SNAP, a local rape crisis center, or find an agency of support. 

I had great success with using the therapy practice of EMDR. (Wikipedia definition) It requires courage and strength. The benefit is that you bring include all your memories to become your true self, the good and bad.

I do not say that the burdens of PTSD and depression won’t disappear. But it does give us hope and the ability to thrive.

No longer will memories control our future. 


RETRIEVED https://standupspeakup.org/memories-cant-be-buried/


About Tim Lennon

President, Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, survivor, advocate, activist, volunteer, twin daughters, power yoga @SNAPnetwork #MeToo #ChurchToo


‘We have to speak out … and be heard’: Life after sexual abuse

Survivors of sexual abuse have spoken of their feelings of isolation and fear. Photograph: Getty Images

Yvonne Roberts Published onSun 9 Jun 2019 18.00 AEST

Observer special report Rape and sexual assault

After decades of denial and cover-up, adult survivors are coming forward, helped by radical new initiatives.

On 2 June, Noa Pothoven, 17, died at home in the Dutch city of Arnhem having refused all fluids and food. She had been sexually assaulted at the age of 11 and raped at 14, and suffered from anorexia and depression. She spoke of her “unbearable suffering” in the aftermath of the attacks – “I have not been alive for so long,” she wrote.

For survivors of childhood abuse, the potential long-term impact of their experiences is only beginning to be exposed; taboo, secrecy and shame still prevail. Yet, slowly, as inquiries are held and more cases come to court, greater numbers of adult survivors of childhood abuse are beginning to come forward. While some can cope well, for others lives and families are torn apart as the root causes remain hidden. Is society doing enough for adult survivors, who, too often, are overlooked, pathologised and criminalised?

Jimmy Savile, “eccentric and flamboyant”, garlanded with honours and awards, died in 2011 aged 84, never having paid for his crimes. A year after his death, he was revealed as a prolific and ruthless sexual predator throughout five decades. Concerns had been raised since the 1960s and suppressed. He had fame and power, so was free to abuse in plain sight.

Since then, a number of prolific offenders have appeared in court including Peter Ball, a bishop who was protected by the establishment, Barry Bennell, a football coach, and the pop singer Gary Glitter. In addition, groups of mainly Asian men, in cities including Rotherham, Nottingham and Oxford, have been given lengthy jail sentences for violently sexually exploiting vulnerable young girls, the victims treated by police and social workers as “child prostitutes”, their plight ignored.

In 2014 the government established the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse (IICSA) to examine how institutions, including hospitals, care homes and boarding schools, have handled their duty of care to protect children. The inquiry has launched 14 investigations and has set up the Truth Project, “I Will Be Heard”. So far, more than 3,000 survivors of abuse have related their experiences at the hands of trusted adults, family members and in institutions.

Tessa Denham, the founder of Visible, says abuse still affects her life. Photograph: Gary Calton/The Observer

Four years ago in Leeds, Savile’s birthplace, Tessa Denham, 58, a counsellor, coach and chief executive of the Women’s Counselling and Therapy Service, organised a workshop. Sixty colleagues from healthcare, the police, GPs, voluntary organisations and the city council attended. “The decades of denial and cover-up were beginning to crack,” Denham says. “That made me think, as a city, ‘What should we do? What do we need to do?’

“Abuse has shaped me. It still affects my daily life,” she says. “I was abused by my grandfather and my stepfather. Yet for years I’d tell everyone that I hadn’t been affected. It was only when I went for counselling in my 30s that I began to join up the dots of my own behaviour.

“I’m middle class, mouthy and I don’t lack confidence. Imagine what it must be like for someone who has none of those resources. Some survivors cope, others experience addiction, unemployment, prison, chaotic, shattered families, and still the secret is kept. That’s why we passionately believe it’s time to make a difference.”

The difference is a potentially groundbreaking holistic city-wide project called Visible, launched in Leeds on 10 June after two years of plannning. The aim is to proactively support adult survivors and open up a national conversation about the extent of need and why long-term government funding is essential.

The ambition is that projects like Visible are replicated across the country.

“It was as if we all gave a collective sigh of relief,” says Sinéad Cregan, Leeds adult services commissioner and chair of Visible. “Phew! At last we’re going to try and do something. More and more people at inquiries are talking for the first time. Yet, across the country, the response has not been good enough.”

Sinéad Cregan says the country’s response has not been good enough. Photograph: Gary Calton/The Observer

What will Visible do in practice? Survivors say that many professionals don’t recognise trauma, and they don’t ask the right questions because they don’t know how to handle the response. Visible hopes to conduct research into what works best, increase public understanding, and train a range of professionals including police, magistrates, employers, commissioners, GPs, teachers and social workers to ask the right questions so that a range of appropriate help is offered. “We want to act as a catalyst.” Denham says. “When money is tight, there are no quick fixes but the door has begun to open.”

“Phil”, 52, is on Visible’s steering group. He waited 40 years before disclosing that as a boy he was abused by two men who threatened to harm his family if he told anyone. “It was when my son was the same age that I told my wife. I had a breakdown. I was worried the same thing would happen to him. I’d text him all the time.

“I waited 12 months before I got into the mental health system. I’ve self-harmed, I’ve tried to take my own life. I was interviewed by the police about Jimmy Savile because I worked with him as a hospital porter – and that’s when it got worse. I see the devil with the abusers’ face. I hear voices. In an ideal world, I’d like for people to speak out and be heard.”

In May, the all-party parliamentary group (APPG) on adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse published a report that drew on a survey of 365 survivors. Long-term consequences of abuse may include physical ailments, changes in brain function and development, post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder and dissociative disorder, an involuntary flight from reality that may include significant memory loss, depression and suicidal thoughts.

In the survey, 90% said their intimate relationships were negatively affected, 89% said their mental health was negatively affected, 72% said that it had damaged their career, and 46% said it had a detrimental effect on their financial situation (because they often had to pay for therapeutic help they couldn’t access otherwise). Only 16% said the NHS mental health services met their need. “I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and the mental health system,” was one response.

“The spectre hanging over them infiltrates every aspect of life,” Sarah Champion, Labour MP and chair of the APPG said in the Commons. “A trigger can be anything – the same aftershave that their abuser was wearing or a feeling of being in an enclosed space. Unless we recognise that these people are victims of crime, they will not be able to lead their full lives and reach the potential that we all deserve to achieve.”

“Deflection, denial and disbelief” has too often greeted those who speak out about abuse. Yet its scale is clear. The number of recorded sexual offences against children under 16 in England and Wales more than doubled in the four years to 2017 from 24,085 to 53,496.

Shaneen Mooney says victims don’t have to carry shame – healing is possible. Photograph: Gary Calton/The Observer

2015 survey of 400 adult survivors indicated that the abuse had begun, on average, at the age of seven and continued for long periods; 90% hadn’t seen their abuser brought to justice. The average wait before survivors tried to access services had been 20 years, and not even then had individuals disclosed abuse. For one in five who disclosed at the time, the abuse continued on average for a further six years.

Last year NHS England announced improved provision for victims of sexual abuse. The five-year strategy has an investment of ÂŁ4m a year until 2020-21. “It’s welcome but it’s a drop in the ocean,” says Fay Maxted, chief executive of the Survivors Trust, which represents 130 organisations. “In real terms, funding has dropped significantly in the last 10 years.”

She is also concerned that the specialist trauma-trained organisations in the voluntary sector, which survivors frequently say they prefer to statutory services, won’t benefit from the funding controlled by GPs’ clinical commissioning groups. “The CCGs often have a lack of understanding of what survivors need.”

“Adult survivors don’t always present as the perfect victim,” explains Gabrielle Shaw, chief executive of the National Association for People Abused in Childhood (Napac). “We all need to understand better that the question isn’t, ‘what’s wrong with you?’ but ‘what happened to you?’”

Shaneen Mooney, 34, a housing officer, who runs her own essential oils company, Essential Flow, waited 16 years before disclosing. At the age of 14 she was groomed by a man in his 30s. “I thought it was romantic love. He ended the affair when I was 16. For years I didn’t value myself. I drank, I took drugs, I was unfaithful. I had a breakdown and dropped out of university and gradually began to realise that what had happened to me wasn’t right. It was rape.

“In 2014 I was given free counselling by a rape support charity. That’s no longer available. Then I waited a year for NHS counselling, which was hard. Gradually, I realised that the silence, keeping all the stuff inside me, was more damaging.”

Now happily married, Mooney says counselling has been invaluable. “I’m in a much better place. Victims don’t have to carry shame and believe there’s something wrong with them. Healing and wellbeing are possible. That’s why I share my truth in the hope that it will encourage others to break the taboo, speak out and get help. Life can change.”

In 2018, Napac, received 6,458 calls on its helpline but there were another 87,619 calls that couldn’t be taken because of lack of resources.

In Leeds, will Visible unleash a demand that similarly can’t be met? According to the IICSA, some 2 million people, are adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse, and 15% of girls and 5% of boys are predicted to experience sexual abuse before the age of 16. In Leeds those figures would translate to 50,000 adult survivors and more than 15,000 children and young people.

Visible was launched with a grant of ÂŁ100,000 from Lloyds Bank Foundation. It has applied for further grants. Leeds city council faces a ÂŁ100m funding gap by 2022. Will hopes be raised but not met?

“Health commissioners and government have to stump up the money,” Richard Barber of Leeds Survivor-Led Crisis Service says unequivocally. “Society has got its head stuck in the sand about the scale of child sexual abuse. As a result, survivors get demonised and traumatised over and over again.”

Sharon Prince says everyone knows somebody who is directly or indirectly affected. Photograph: Gary Calton/The Observer

“Everybody knows somebody who is directly or indirectly affected,” points out Sharon Prince, consultant psychologist with Leeds and York Partnership NHS Foundation Trust, a part of Visible. “We have to change the response. That can range from family and friends listening and validating to more formal interventions. The first steps are for people to trust enough so they can disclose and be believed.”

Visible promotes “trauma-informed” support for survivors. It is based on building trust, collaboration and a survivor exercising choice. “It’s all about the quality of the relationship,” Prince says.

While funds for survivors are woefully inadequate, the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse has spent an extraordinary £96m since 2014. It has recommended that support for adult survivors requires “urgent” attention. Money is promised in the forthcoming spending review. In addition, the parliamentary group wants the Home Office to commission research into the hidden economic and social cost of child sexual abuse, collect data on what is spent on therapeutic care, and research what support works best.

Dr Carol-Ann Hooper, Visible’s evaluator, says: “In the US, the term ‘parallel justice’ has been coined to argue for reparation for victims to take its place alongside the prosecution of offenders to enable survivors to heal and rebuild their lives. There is also a significant income-based justice gap. Those who can afford to pay for therapeutic help have options, those who can’t, may have none.”

“Helena”, 60, a former teacher, pays for trauma therapy. “Otherwise I’d have to wait several months and I can’t.” As a child, she and her friend, Janet, played in the street. A teenage girl invited them into her home. “We’d dress up in her clothes and stilettos,” Helena says. Play turned to abuse and both children had a bottle inserted in their vaginas. “I felt I’d done wrong. I did tell my parents three years later. They said, ‘We can’t do owt. It’s water under the bridge. The abuse made me wary of young women, mistrust everybody. I still find it very difficult to hug people. I became anorexic. I wanted to be unseen. Occasionally I’d mention what happened and people would say, ‘women don’t do that’.”

A few years ago, Helena went to an exhibition. “I’ve been lucky. There was an image called Release. I thought yes, you need to unburden, take away those heavy things on your shoulders. For years, I didn’t like clothes or dressing up, I didn’t like high heels. I never had friendships. But suddenly, I thought, yes, I can have friends. And I do. Abuse results in so many ripples over a lifetime. People don’t think to ask, ‘what are those ripples really about?’”

Visible already has plans to expand its work to include sporting bodies, churches, mosques, major corporations, magistrates and prisons. Leeds city council will also look at its own large workforce to assess the needs of potentially several hundred survivors. “We are also keen to collaborate with anyone in the UK,” Denham says. “We cannot afford to slip back.”

I was isolated and petrified

“I was abused until I was 11 by someone outside the family. When it was happening, it was horrible but I didn’t want to make a fuss” says Debbie, 43.

“By the time it stopped, I was isolated and petrified of everything. I’d hide in the cupboard if the phone rang. People would think I was rude. I just wanted to be invisible.

“I worked hard at university because I thought I was thick and horrible. I had a breakdown. I tried to commit suicide. I was in psychiatric hospital for four months. I became anorexic. At no point did anybody ask me why I hated myself. Why I was anorexic.”

At one point, Debbie weighed four stone and suffered multiple organ failure. “It took 10 years before I began psychotherapy and somebody finally asked me the right questions; otherwise my earlier medical records all say things like, ‘Deborah’s had a lot of input with little progress’.

“I’ve been diagnosed with OCD, personality disorder, complex PTSD.”

Unusually, Debbie received 12 years of support on the NHS, but then it stopped. Now she pays privately for psychotherapy. “I know things cognitively but I have no feeling. I’m not in touch with things emotionally. I’ve no attachment to anyone or anything.

“Six years ago, my mum asked if anyone had done anything to me. I don’t want my mum to know. I don’t want her to work out who it is. I don’t want him to say it didn’t happen. I want to feel safe and not want to be dead. I want to feel.”Topics


RETRIEVED https://www.theguardian.com/society/2019/jun/09/adult-survivors-childhood-sex-abuse-come-forward